and to quote George Costanza, It's not you, its me. Like a muscle that's been rested for years, that part of me is too weak to spend time around you and not exacerbate any of my SD ways. This is not to say you are bad for me. . .In reality, I am bad for me.
that maybe I have found the reason for VOX, the purpose, the benefit to me. Instead of an endless parade of other peoples works (though I like having a place to save things that bring me comfort) maybe I need to focus. How did The Moody Blues put it? " . . . Letters I've written, never meaning to send . . ." Well, I said today inside my head that I would not write you this year. You know what time of year it is. It's 'that' time. The time when I screwed up my schedule and ended up with only 24 hours with you. The first time in my life I accepted death within the metal bird as a necessity if I was ever to see you. The time you told me it would be even harder now that we had been together to be apart. The time of year I get paid to have my ass chewed on, yet you made it all melt as I listened to you take the young men shopping.
Anyway, not reminiscing, just saying what time of year it is. And I've decided that if I have any shred of decency left, I'll honor your request. You're right my ass is stubborn. The problem with stubborn is, eventially it breaks. So one step at a time . . .
And I'm 99.8% sure you'll never read this, so I really can just let the shit roll from my lips, knowing it'll not bother you in the slightest.
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